Today at work I was being (lovingly) teased by people trying to wind me up that my husband and best friend are overseas together for work. After they realised I genuinely wasn’t bothered at all, (I even told them that he had purposely left his wedding ring at home so it didn’t get lost which they found very amusing!) it got me wondering that maybe it’s not common to have such a high level of trust in relationships. Thing is, I don’t get how any meaningful relationship exists without such trust.
It makes sense that we trust those closest to us, our partners, family members and closest friends, as well as those entrusted to care for us and our loved ones such as health care workers and teachers.
So how do you get to a point where you genuinely have no doubt in the trust you have? It’s common knowledge to most people that trust needs be earned, but does that mean we start a relationship with distrust? Not usually. So does it mean we blindly trust everyone we enter into a relationship with? Well I don’t think that’s true either. I would say we start somewhere in the middle. Wary but wanting to believe the best of someone. Open yet slightly guarded. So if we start off in the middle, how do we grow trust? Obvious answers would be good communication, honesty and respect. I know all my most important relationships have all those things but I think I’ve noticed something else too. I think it’s self confidence. If I know that I am being open, honest and respectful then I expect the same of someone else. In my experience, most often it’s given.
Over the years I’ve had many relationships weeded out of my life, leaving only the best ones, the ones with mutual trust and respect. For without the basic fundamental part of a relationship, in my opinion there is no relationship at all.