The one about the girl who didn’t

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This day last year I birthed a tiny yet silent baby. One who was so perfect and beautiful, I could barely believe I had created her. She had the most perfect little feet, the same button nose as all my other children and the same wonky little fingers and exact same hand prints as Jadis. Perfect in every way except she was silent. An eerie silence that should never be heard in a birthing suite. 

Today is a really hard day in so many ways but I also feel like celebrating that she was here. She still is my baby. Still born yet still born. It was still her birthday, it’s just the only one she will ever get. Pretty much all she ever got except a funeral. No first steps, no toothy grins, no first Christmas, or Easter, no kinder or school, no boyfriends, weddings or children. Nothing but those few months we had with her safely tucked up in my tummy. 

Do not cry that I am gone, celebrate that I was here. 

So today, in memory of her, hug your children a little tighter, notice those little things about them which you so often over look, and be thankful for everything they do. Because they are here. 

   
  
  
The only picture with both my daughters. Jadis devastated the sister she longed for so desperately wasn’t coming home with her. 

 
Jadis giving Lyra a high five.